Through this roller coaster of a journey with Oliver in the hospital, there we’re many times I just wasn’t ok. Far from it on most days. I had a very hard time after finding out about Oliver’s heart condition, so much that I couldn’t bring myself to even talk to my own family about what was happening, or even absorb the fact that this wasn’t a nightmare I could wake up from. It was real life and I didn’t want to believe it. Justin, you were the glue that held me together then, and still are now. This post is for you.
I remember the first night after they told us about Oliver’s condition, that he would need open heart surgery right away in order for him to survive. We slept in a little pumping room in the hospital because we were 2 hours from home and had no place to stay. I was in shock still, and in pain from having gave birth just 30 hours prior. You were scared and hurting, I could see it in your eyes, yet you remained strong and brave, you were asking the Doctor’s questions, keeping the family updated, and comforting me. I will forever admire your strength and courage.
Through the many month’s that went by while in the PCICU, you did the same thing every day. You woke up, went to visit Oliver, gave me a kiss and then left to work, Repeat. Sometimes you would forget to eat just so you would have enough time to spend with us before leaving. I complained many day’s because you weren’t there, when I should have been thanking you for supporting us, financially and emotionally. I hope you know how much I appreciate you. It was very overwhelming for me being in the hospital day in and day out, some days I just really needed you, and I know you were just trying to do everything to keep us afloat. I’m so lucky to be with a man like you, and I’m so happy that we made this beautiful little miracle baby together. This journey is not over, but I know that no matter what happens, we can get through it together.
I love you forever and always, babe.